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Well…. This week has been another painful one.
There have been a few trades, mostly losers. Here’s the biggest mind bug about all of this:
As it stands I lost most trades (all but 3) … and I’m down 7% this month… but remember a couple of weeks back we spoke about my analysis and how I had come to the conclusion that I could half SL and Double Lots while keeping risk at 1%…? Well If I HADNT incorporated these new rules I would have won 11 out of 12 trades taken this month and id be in a very healthy profit for yet another month…. OUCH.
As you can imagine after spending about 6 hours analysing all of my trades that day, I was confident that the new rules I had incorporated would have a great effect on my account but instead I experienced a losing streak… I never take things out on the market, I take full responsibility for any trade outcome so, naturally I started to think back to when I was analysing my trades the other week… I thought back to my reasoning… the REAL reason behind spending 6 hours analysing every trade id taken.
At the time I told myself that I was doing it to make sure that I was trading consistently and to see if anything needed tweaking… but let’s face it things were working … very well… id just broken the 10% mark for the second month in a row… so maybe the subconscious REAL reason for this analysis was to JUSTIFY halving my SL and doubling lot size… maybe I had already made my mind up before I started analysing… in honesty this seems more like the real reason looking back… I got too arrogant because I had 2 fantastic months and I was on a winning streak (If I remember rightly id won around 28/30 trades)… so there we are… I betrayed myself and tricked myself into changing my system without even knowing it, even if the changes were small… they weren’t needed… and I got hurt as a result.
It’s amazing how time and time again our own minds can betray us no matter how in control of it we think we may be when in the trading environment… remember, we are our own worse enemy.
I learned a lesson this week and that is to REALLY understand myself when doing things such as analysis trades or reviewing rules… I thought I had 100% mastered being in control of my actions and emotion, but the last two weeks have taught me NEVER to take this for granted.
Now EVERY time I even consider making a change to the way I operate I will ask myself an important question:
Am I doing this to ensure I’m staying consistent and to see if there are any serious problems with my strategy, OR am I doing this to justify a change I want to make… and from there WHY do I want to make this change – is it to become a better trader, or is it because of Greed!
That’s it for now but I’ll be back to wrap up for the year next week!